*slap*

Today in the grocery store I overheard this:

Old Hag: I want to pay with debit, but I don't want to pay the 35 cent fee.
Cashier: That's fine, just push the credit button instead.
Old Hag: But I NEVER put groceries on a credit card! And in all my time coming here I've never been charged that 35 cent fee.
Cashier: I don't see how that's possible. It does it automatically. And if you push credit, it will still take the money out of your checking account, so it's not a charge.
Old Hag: NO, I don't WANT to pay with credit.
Cashier: It won't be, it will still come out of your checking account, but it won't charge you the 35 cent fee.
Old Hag: It's the PRINCIPLE of the thing. I've been coming here since this place opened. I'm a loyal customer. I should not have to pay the 35 cent fee this time or any other. I'm going to come in tomorrow and talk to John about this.
Cashier: *gets flustered* Fine. Are you going to run your card through as credit or debit though?
Old Hag: I NEVER PUT GROCERIES ON CREDIT!
Cashier: Then it's going to charge you an extra 35 cents...
Old Hag: I refuse to do that, on principle.

(a second cashier chimes in and backs up the first one. eventually the bitch pushes the credit button)

Cashier: Ok I just need you to sign this.
Old Hag: Why?! IT'S DEBIT!
Cashier: Because we ran it as credit to avoid the fee!
Old Hag: I'm going to talk to John about this and I'm going to have my reciept in my HAND. And in OTHER stores they don't make you sign unless it's more than $30. *gets ready to leave*

(now this wrinkled old cunt puts the icing on the cake...)

Old Hag: UM, EXCUSE ME. I asked for PAPER, not plastic.
Cashier: *REALLY upset, clumsily rebags food*

A few comments to the Old Hag:
1. The cashier told you how to avoid the fee. You didn't listen. Suck it.
2. What "principle" is it that's been violated? Yeah, didn't think so.
3. You HAVE been charged that fucking fee before, many times. You just haven't noticed, and this makes me very very happy deep inside.
4. I saw you after you left the store, and I saw you take your groceries out of the paper bag you demanded and put them back in the plastic bag. I wanted to give you a swift kick in your saggy ass. Not that you'd have felt it through the diaper.

One comment to the Cashier:
Hun, just quit your job. It doesn't get any better.